Gearing up

Gearing up 

Journal entry by Eve Ilsen — 38 minutes ago

I took full advantage of the last fully restful shabbat for a while.
Food was simple.
The unusual delight of the day was a visit from a friend who has not lived in Boulder for a while.
It is a joy to know that the phone is unlikely to ring, that no business will be happening, that the task of the day is to utterly enjoy and appreciate and be grateful.  And so I did.

Tomorrow begins the deep cleaning in preparation for Pesach.  Grateful for that too!
I miss the feeling that I am doing it not only for the holiday, but for Zalman.
I suspect that he might have been happier had I done less, and consequently been less frantic.
He felt that way about shabbos prep too.
This year I will kasher only the dishes I now know I will use, and tape other cabinets closed.
I will box all the unopened not-for-Pesach cans or packages, and donate them to one of the local food banks.  
I remember our first year here, when I taught a class for women that I called "Not in Shul:  Jewish Spiritual Home Practices".  For our session before Pesach, we met and loaded all our chometz into two large car trunks, and hauled it off to donate.  Then, it was a new practice that no-one here had done before.  Now, it is done all over; and the shuls do it too.

And, as always, I am aware of the mental/emotional/spiritual chometz buzzing in the background.
The process of cleaning thoroughly, and not leaving little messes where they won't be seen, has ramifications beyond the kitchen.  The worst mess is the desk where I currently type.  We will see if I manage to make any inroads here before the holiday.  Layered in the piles are unfulfilled promises, good intentions, forgotten plans, reminder notes, causes for embarrassment, regrets.
Cleaning these out is much harder than the kitchen, and likely more far-reaching.
We will see what I succeed in doing this week; this year.

Shavu'a tov.